Hello, Homeschool: The Good, The Bad & The Beautiful

Hello, homeschool. 

One year ago, I would have never imagined that I would be homeschooling my kids in 2020. I have a dozen of wonderful friends who homeschool and love it, but I honestly didn't think it was possible for me. I doubted that we had the finances or the resources, recognized that I did not have the patience, and knew that my children *did not* respond well to me as their teacher (as experienced through years of piano lessons and "fun" learning attempts).  

First Day of Homeschool!

Zoë Anastasia

Age 9

4th Grade

Favorite Color: Turquoise

Favorite Food: Tacos

Favorite Activity: Drawing

Future Dream Job: Artist or Fashion Designer

But then the coronavirus pandemic took over the globe. Our lives (as they were) came to a halt and suddenly - we were crisis remote schooling: homeschooling under immense pressure without any warning or preparation. It was an intense bumpy ride, but it began a journey to where we are today.

While Covid-19 was a catalyst to our decision to pull our kids out of public school, it was not the sole reason. It was a catalyst that set in motion questions, thoughts and dreams, and revealed significant realities. After a rocky transition in March, we noticed a surprising change in our kids. The morning and afternoon meltdowns that were normal for Isaiah had become much more rare. While his struggle with focus, memory and following directions was still apparent - it had improved, and we were able to experiment with ways to keep his body moving to facilitate learning (rather than distract from it). Zoë, who struggled with school-related anxiety for the past two years and had multiple experiences of dreading going back to school for one reason or another, was given time and space to talk through and work through the reasons behind her fears, as well as begin to face the roots of a paralyzing perfectionism. Even Isabelle, who previous to the pandemic would spend most of the day screaming and demanding attention felt so content just to have her siblings and me home all the time that she would then happily go off and play by herself! Zoë and Isaiah were more rested, less overwhelmed, had hours of free time to play and explore, and began to burst with creativity and alive-ness. 

As home-learning continued through the end of spring, we began to wonder and question. We looked ahead to the potential impacts Covid-19 would have on this coming school year and the ways the schools would need to respond. We looked at our kids thriving at home. We prayed and asked God for guidance to walk in wisdom - not fear or foolishness...and made a terrifying yet exciting decision to do what we believe is best for our children's physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health. It may not be "forever," but it is "for now," and we will see what the next year or two, or five may bring!

Isaiah Benjamin

Age 6

1st Grade

Favorite Color: Green

Favorite Food: Cheesy Brats

Favorite Activity: Super Smash Bros

Future Dream Job: Pokémon Expert & Marine Biologist

I gathered insight from my homeschooling friends, read a life-changing, mind-shifting book about the concept of scholé - restful teaching and learning (Sarah Mackenzie's Teaching from Rest), and found my heart craving this radical redirection for our family away from the frantic hustle of our previous "normal." The "teacher" in me began bubbling over in excitement over curriculum exploration and creation, and I dreamt up a flow to our days that could allow peace to dwell and creativity to flourish, all while pursuing learning and growth fueled not by anxiety or pressure, but by wonder and delight. 

And so, here we are! We had our first week of homeschooling this past week. Our first day was filled with exhilaration and celebration, and all three kids were eager to step into our "new normal." Isabelle played on her own for hours(!) and joined in when she felt like it. 

Isabelle Lucille

Age 2.5

Playschool

Favorite Color: Pink

Favorite Food: Mac-n-cheese or pizza

Favorite Activity: Playing with Paw Patrol pups

Future Dream Job: Member of the Paw Patrol as a puppy

And then, day two was a lot less exciting. The newness wore off quickly. The struggles that had surfaced in the spring (namely, Zoë and math and Isaiah with anything written) continued. There were tears and resistance. Learning can be extremely emotional at times! For example, while learning about possessive apostrophes:

Zoë: "But why doesn't its have an apostrophe? That doesn't make sense. And it doesn't follow the rules!!"

Me: "Well, the English language doesn't always make sense, and it doesn't always follow the rules either."

Zoë: (sobbing) "I wish I didn't speak English! Why can't we just speak Spanish or something?!"

By day three, Isabelle was really ready for some mommy-time. Fortunately, Thursday she got to have me all to herself for a couple hours while she went to her yearly eye exam. :)

There certainly have been challenges: the challenge of teaching two very different learners at the same time - one who needs movement and focuses better with background noise, and one who needs absolute stillness and silence; the challenge of motivating one who is motivated by very little; the challenge of quickly and calmly rotating through the demands on my attention (and them being patient while waiting); the challenge of finding a balance for restful learning and necessary productivity in schoolwork and housework for all of us; the challenge of finding myself exhausted by the middle of the day when we finish school time and then having eager children ready for me to play with them. 

Cheers to a new adventure!

But there have also been many beautiful moments as well. I love the rhythm of our days. My favorite parts of our day are the bookends - the beginning and the end. We begin with studying the Bible and memorizing scripture together, watch CNN10, and then using the framework of God's Word and the needs we see on the news, we pray - for ourselves, for our community and for our world. It has been a sweet and precious time with them. After language arts, math and lunch, we dive into our two loop subjects (loop A: history, science, delight driven learning and loop b: art, Spanish, music, typing) and then end with "teatime" where we enjoy a snack or tea party while I read aloud from one of our history chapter books. We began reading Sees Behind Trees this week and we could hardly put it down! 

Learning fun + yum

It is a gift having all three together under one roof and having the time and freedom to do the fun ideas I have had floating around in my head for years, just waiting to be done. I love watching them light up with excitement over discovering something new and being a very present part of their learning. I am grateful for the pace and flexibility that allows for detours and long, deep conversations when they arise. And when we need to, we can press the "pause" button and deal with those intense emotions fully and work to find the root cause of the struggle. 

All things considered - the good, the bad and the beautiful, we had a delightful beginning to our homeschool adventure and I look forward with eager anticipation to learning, growing, creating, and exploring with them.

Dear sweet Isabelle, 

I am excited to have you along for the ride! You bring so much joy, silliness and sweetness to our days. I hope you enjoy your journey through the alphabet this year as you and I get to discover the letter of the week together! Thank you for playing so contentedly on your own this week and being as patient as toddlerly-possible while you waited for your turn for my attention. I love how your imagination creates whole new worlds for you and your friends (Paw Patrol puppies or stuffies). My prayer for you this year is God would continue to shape and mold your independent spirit into one that leans on Him for strength so that you may walk boldly in faith and lead others with confidence. May God continue to grow your compassionate, empathetic heart to help and love those around you, and may He develop that intense desire for "rightness" and everything in its place to lead you to desire and work toward justice and righteousness in this world.

Dear Isaiah, 

You bring such energy, humor and excitement to our days! You have grown up so much in this past year - taller, smarter, reading like a pro, problem solving with your engineering mind. You are so curious and full of questions about the way things work and why. I pray that God would continue to develop that desire to pursue knowledge so that the motivation to learn would come from deep within you. And may God lead you to find wisdom, which will lead you to know Him. May God grow in you an ability to listen well - not only out of respectful obedience, but out of humble love to both God and people. I pray that God would plant in you seeds of great compassion, so that your eyes may be open to the hurt and needs of those around you and you would be driven to act in gentleness and selflessness. May God continue to grow your creativity and imagination as you explore your gifts and abilities. And may your joy be found in Jesus, who is the only One who will fully satisfy those deep longings for more. 

Dear Zoë,

You have grown into a beautiful, delightful, creative, talented, hard-working, tender-hearted young woman. Some days I wish you would stop and stay my little girl forever, but I also adore watching you find yourself and spread your wings as you prepare to soar into the beginnings of womanhood. May God guide you as you continue to ask those deep philosophical and theological questions - even when we can't give you answers. May God keep your heart filled with compassion and concern for the world, even when it is painful to care. May God show you the height and depths of His great love for you that lays the foundation of your identity - not your performance, not your achievements, not your failures, not your mistakes. And may you soak and saturate in Jesus' love for you so much so that you are filled with a content and satisfied love for yourself just the way God made you - no matter what anyone else may say, no matter what you may do or not do. And may you grow in your knowledge of the Truth so that you may be able to fight against the lies that beat you down and try to prevent you from walking out boldly in the gifts God has given you. 

May God sustain me with strength, wisdom and patience to lead well and love well 

May our home be a peace-filled and joyful environment in which they can learn and grow.

May we learn not just to learn, but may our learning lead us to

 greater love and awe of God, 

greater love and compassion for people, 

and greater love and care of God's good and beautiful creation. 

As we seek to follow in Jesus' footsteps, may we grow 

"in wisdom and stature, in favor of God and with people" 

(Luke 2:52)

"And this I pray, that [our] love may abound more and more 

in real knowledge and in practical insight, 

so that [we] may learn to recognize and treasure what is excellent, 

and that [we] may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ; 

filled with the fruit of righteousness which comes through Jesus Christ, 

to the glory and praise of God." 

(Philippians 1:9-11 AMP)

All through the grace of the God who goes before us, 

with Jesus walking alongside us, redeeming and perfecting us,

 and through the power of the Holy Spirit that enables and strengthens us 

to walk this path before us.

Amen.

- Larissa

An Unforgettable Summer

“Life is rich and full here... everywhere... 

if we can only learn how to open our whole hearts

 to its richness and fullness.”

― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Avonlea

Life is rich and full - even in the midst of a pandemic - and we are learning more and more each day how to open our hearts to its richness and fullness. This summer may have been missing some very significant, precious opportunities of time spent with our favorite people in our favorite places, but it left a hole that we filled with all sorts of new adventures and activities that we may not have attempted otherwise. It was an unforgettable summer; one that forced us to be resourceful and creative with little, identify what and who we value the most, and make the most of every moment that we had with the people we love...not knowing what tomorrow may bring. 

We began the summer with long lists of things we wanted to do - and we did! Almost all of them! We filled our weeks with themed camps directed by the delight of Zoë and Isaiah (and Isabelle happily joined in, or just did her own thing - like she does). We formed a close knit group of equally cautious and careful friends, our "quarantine crew" to play with throughout the summer and I am so grateful that we had this small community to continue a small sense of normality in a world of continuous change and unknowns. The summer was rich and full and flew by all too quickly! 

Yet even as I look back and smile with content at the summer gone by, I recognize my privilege and blessing in being able to say these words. For many, this summer was a summer of great loss, great pain, great destruction, and great turmoil. In the midst of the joy, I also feel a heaviness of heart - and so I pray and hope in the God who says, "When the earth and all its people quake, it is I who hold its pillars firm." (Psalm 75: 3)

May God be a firm foundation, a rock of refuge for you in this turbulent time. May God open your heart to the richness and fullness of life even in the little things. And may you find hope in the One who is the "hope of all the ends of the earth." (Psalm 65:5)

One of my favorite current traditions is making slideshows of our pictures for the end of seasons/end of the year. Here is our "Summer" slideshow of an unforgettable summer, rich and full with many sweet, simple moments of life together:

We celebrated our last day of summer with our long time friends who have navigated through six years of PhD family life with us - through thick and thin. It was the perfect way to celebrate surviving a hot summer "covid-style" and end one chapter as we begin to turn the page to a new adventure.

As we jump headlong into homeschooling tomorrow, it is not out of fear or an escape from reality. It is on a peaceful path in pursuit of a learning and growth fueled not by anxiety but by wonder and delight.

And so the adventure continues...